Quote from misterpagopago on October 2020, 6:17 pm

Here's my writing from today's class: 

What am I avoiding in the present moment?

There is a boundless place of exile in my heart.  I cannot feel what’s in it and yet, I know it’s there.

How could that be? 

I feel the pressure of dark energies pushing against this container that is my body. 

Holding on for dear life? Holding IN for dear life! 

If I were to let go, surrender and fully live into this experience, would I be releasing myself into forces that would leave me torn and tattered in the bottom of pit, baking in the blazing sun?

Would the release of the energy which I hold onto have me spin out into an insane rage where I’d be shot like a mad dog in the street, naked and covered with blood with a butcher knife still held tightly in my hand?

And yet, the holding in is its own kind of exile - a Sisyphean curse - expending the best of my life force holding on what must to be expressed. 

Jesus said: "If you bring forth that which is within you that needs to come forth, that which you bring forth will save you. And, if you don’t bring forth that which needs to come forth, that which you don’t bring forth will destroy you."

Am I waiting for my real life to bring as Father Time moves me toward the end of this board game called life?

Am I Rocket Man, burning out my fuse up here alone?

Is playing safe, the biggest risk of all? 

Ken 

Quote from Diane on October 2020, 10:11 am

First of all, let me express my deepest sympathy, Mark, for the loss of your friend. Also, my appreciation for your timely topics and weekly Zoom meetings where we can share our feelings.  I hope you take some comfort in knowing that you are helping so many in these difficult times.

Thank you for this week's video.  It was just what I needed--some humor to lighten the load.  We've been reflecting on some heavy topics--how the pandemic is affecting us, love, regret, remorse.  Having acted out of character a couple of times in recent weeks, I've been feeling both regret and remorse for my actions (reactions).  I can be extremely hard on myself at times.  Urzila's TED talk was a good reminder to let all that go and come back into the present.

Diane

Quote from Mark Matousek on November 2020, 9:04 am

Thanks, Diane!  Sorry for my late reply to this.  I think it's a good idea to behave "badly" now and then -- provided we're not overtly harming others --  to be reminded to forgive ourselves, if for no other reason!  I'm glad you enjoyed this TED talk.  We really do need to remember to laugh!

Hope to see you soon. My best to you, as always,

Mark : )

Quote from Mark Matousek on November 2020, 10:09 am

Thanks for posting this, Ken!  I already sent you my comments, but I really appreciate you sharing this with the rest of the group. See you tonight, I hope!  : ) M